The Maverick Marketer

I guess the nice guy theme wasn’t just on my mind.

Here’s a snippet of an email that I received on 5-16 from a guy who claims to be an authority on dating.

I don’t really know if he is or not.

And frankly I don’t give a whoot.

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What I do know is that he uses some interesting marketing tactics.

Give it a looksy.

———————–

Hey guys,Many guys are under the impression that if they want to get married

or have a long term relationship, they must suddenly become a "nice

guy."

It depends, of course, what you mean by "nice guy," but that is

usually the way to sure disaster, both in marriage, or out of

marriage.  Read the email below to discover what it is women really

want in a man.

Jack, answer me this...do you want to get married? or are you out

there for yourself?

I have met some fine ladies with your advice, but also think I have

lost some good ones, because they are not about the moment, but

about the future, and some women, yes even attractive ones, look

for certain qualities in a man that have to do with niceness. ( and

my naughty boy side, has left me hanging in those situations)....I

mean I truly believe some women, just want a "nice guy", a geek

even! to settle with.  What are your opinions on this?  And don't

give me crap, lol, all in good fun, but coming from a once married

perspective, I know that certain women feel that "biological

clock".

HAVE A GREAT DAY!

James F.

JA:  Thanks for the email, James.  I've never been of the belief

that someone who is not married and has no desire to be is out

there for themselves.  They simply recognize when a situation is

not appropriate for them.  Some people are good candidates for

marriage, some not.  The trouble starts when those who are not are

forced into a marriage because they give into the pressure of

society--there is a reason why the divorce rate is sky high.

That being said, while I am not interested in marriage at this very

second of my life, I may certainly be interested in the future when

I've achieved some personal milestones.  I think marriage is a fine

thing, but I think it is something that must be entered into very

carefully, and with great forethought. Few people do this.

I have dated many women who are interested in getting married, and

I was always quite clear to them that while I was not the "one" for

them, I'd always be in their life as a true friend.  The irony is,

I've been in these women's lives longer than their husbands, some

women with multiple husbands.  If you are honest and upfront with

women about your intentions, they will respect you (most guys are

not).

Let's talk about the "nice guy."  It's actually a vague term, one

that leads to a lot of confusion.  When women refer to a man as a

"nice guy," the implication is he's a pushover, someone who won't

stand up to, or for them.  Women want nothing to do with such a man.

What they do want is a man with a strong sense of personal

authority, a well developed fun, playful naughty boy side, a man

who is kind and genuine, and provides them with feeling of

protection and security.  She needs to know you always have her

best interests at heart.  All of these characteristics in total are

important to a woman, and if you've been left hanging, it's

probably because you were a little deficient in one or more of

them.  Keep in mind women do NOT want just a "naughty boy," they

want a man with a naughty boy side.  The distinction is subtle, but

crucial.

On with the fun... -------------------------

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